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Boyack's 'Practical Guide' Goes Beyond the Cliches
When my husband spotted Strangling Your Husband Is Not an Option by Merrilee Browne
After the first chapter or so, I have to say I was pretty annoyed with Sister Boyack. I had left the book by the toilet in the master bathroom, so my husband had scanned this first section as well; even he said, "Sounds like she has a 1950s mentality." Basically, the first part of the book (Chapter 2, really) concerns the "Five Don'ts of Wifehood," most of which include focusing solely on your husband (to the exclusion of other duties and interests) and making yourself attractive so that he won't cast his roving eyes elsewhere. I thought this was unrealistic and insulting to both men and women. Boyack did make some good points, but overall, I was not impressed with Chapter 2.
Luckily, I kept reading, because Boyack really did have some good thoughts and ideas. Basically, her philosophy is that wives cannot "fix" their husbands. They should quit whining about all of his faults and focus on perfecting themselves. Boyack suggests that women take care of themselves - physically, spiritually and emotionally - so that they are secure enough to allow their men to resolve problems in their own - uniquely male - ways. She says that wives' incessant nagging and criticism prove that they have no faith in their husbands, thus leading to husbands who don't believe in themselves. Sister Boyack backs up her guidelines with quotes from leading psychologists (including both the predictable - John Gray - and the surprising - Dr. Phil), LDS church leaders and the scriptures. With these heavyweights on her side and 25 years of marriage under her belt, it's hard to deny: Merrilee Browne Boyack knows what she's talking about.
Now, I'm not saying I agree with everything she says - I know my husband is not going to stray just because my gray hairs are overdue for a visit with my hair stylist - but I did extract some valuable information from Boyack's book. Of particular interest to me was the "As if" philosophy she describes and the section where she quotes Dr. Michael Gurian on how males think. I was also pleasantly surprised by the way she sidestepped the canned Sunday School answers to marital problems (pray, attend the temple together, etc.) and sought answers beyond the usual cliches. Not that she didn't beat dead horses in places, but I felt that she did have some new insight.
As far as the issues I had with the book: I thought Boyack lingered a little too long on issues I felt were not that important (honestly, does she really think husbands are going to dismiss their wives because they wear sweats once in awhile?), and didn't take enough time with the issues I found truly fascinating (the differences between how men and women solve problems). I also thought Boyack's tone got annoying at times. She was obviously trying to be upbeat and warm, but I found myself frequently irritated by her phraseology - I mean, nobody says dagnabbit.
All in all, I liked Strangling Your Husband Is Not an Option. It was quick, readable and had some valuable advice. I don't agree with all of Boyack's opinions, but I do believe that every marriage can be improved upon, and I will be incorporating some of her tips into mine. For instance, as soon as I publish this post, I'm going to call the hair salon - I have a few gray strands that need some attention!
Grade: B
A (Slightly Energetic) Wrap Up Post
In 2007, I read:
66 books total (give or take; I know I didn't review every book I read. Still, this number seems really low to me.)
Of those books:
25 were written by male authors; 39 were written by females; and 2 were written by a male/female team
59 were fiction; 7 were non-fiction
1 was a short story collection
19 were YA novels
I also abandoned 3 books and completed 1 challenge.
I read a lot of books I really loved. The best 3 were:
The Book Thief by Marcus Zusak
Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
Stardust by Neil Gaiman
Very, very interesting. My goal in 2008 is to read more, especially non-fiction. I'm also going to keep a running list of books read on the sidebar - that will make my 2008 wrap-up post much easier :) I've also got a ton of challenges to tackle. Furthermore, I'm going to try to finish up several series of which I'm currently in the middle. So, stay tuned. Lots of fun stuff is coming up!
Happy reading this year. I look forward to reading all of your blogs!
The King of Mulberry Street Celebrates Triumph Over Trial

The year is 1892, and 9-year-old Dom Napoli is sleeping in a barrel on the mean streets of New York. It's not the life he imagined for himself when he stowed away on a cargo ship bound for America. Now, his homeland of Naples, Italy, is far away and he has nothing except the clothes on his back and the brand new shoes his mother gave him before secreting him on the ship. Although he knows no English, Dom knows he must do what his mother advised: he must simply survive.
But survival on the streets is no easy feat. The filthy alleys teem with homeless children willing to commit any crime to satisfy their cruel padrones. Dom knows enough to stay away from these evil overlords, but he still has to live. Other street kids advise him to steal what he needs, but Dom can't bring himself to do it. After all, what would his Nonna think if he surrendered all the principles she strove so hard to teach him? Maybe he has to hide his Jewish roots to survive, but he will not abandon them altogether.
So, Dom does what his Jewish ancestors have always done - he pulls himself up by his bootstraps (so to speak) and gets to work. First, he hunts for a job to earn money for passage back to Italy. His search leads him to Chatham Street, where he hopes to find work in a factory. When he realizes that Italian workers make less money than anyone but the Chinese, he knows a factory job will never work; he will have to use his own ingenuity to make enough money to get home. While visiting his friend Tin Pan Alley, a beggar on Wall Street, Dom hits upon a brilliant plan. He decides to buy a long sandwich in Five Points for .25, cut it into smaller pieces and sell the portions for a quarter each on Wall Street. With the help of Tin Pan Alley (the only one who speaks enough English to hawk the food) and Gaetano (Dom's friend, also from Naples), he starts his own business. The sandwich plan works like a dream, earning Dom and his friends more money than they ever dreamed possible. Their newfound wealth brings trouble as well as prosperity - suddenly, bigger boys are stalking them, eager for the coins in their pockets; Tin Pan Alley's padrone is getting suspicious; and other kids are moving in on their turf. Still, Dom is determined not only to survive, but to spread his fortune to the other street children. His generosity - or stupidity, in Gaetano's mind - earns him the nickname "The King of Mulberry Street."
Dom soon realizes, however, that even a king can't right every wrong he sees. His determination to topple the patroni system leads him to a situation that will change his life forever. Learning the truth about his mother will also force him to face truths he'd rather not see. Will these horrors cripple the boy? Will he succomb to the gritty streets and their evil padrones? And, most important, will Dom survive to return to his beloved Italy?
I enjoyed this story about the resilient Dom, who fights to stay alive without letting his humanity die. He's a boy with whom all readers can identify, and one whom all will cheer on as he battles for survival. His story moves along swiftly, with well-developed characters and vivid settings. Although Napoli hints at the darker elements of street life (i.e. prostitution and drug addiction), the references are subtle. The only truly devastating scene in the book is when Dom confronts Tin Pan Alley's padrone. Despite these dark matters, the tone of the novel is definitely hopeful. It really celebrates triumph over trial and remaining true to yourself even in the most dire situations. You'll love this story of Dom, The King of Mulberry Street.
Grade: A
Bookish Gifts
I wasn't planning to post here until after the New Year, but I wanted to pop my head in and show you the fun bookish gifts I got for Christmas and my birthday (the 22nd). My MIL got me Bookopoly, which looks like a lot of fun. She also got me Big Susan by Elizabeth Orton Jones and the hilarious red lady on the far left, whose skirt holds one of my favorite quotations: "She is too fond of books, and it has addled her brain." I believe it's by Louisa May Alcott, who penned one of my favorite books, Little Women. I received Strangling Your Husband is Not an Option by Merrillee Browne Boyack - you'll never guess from whom it came :) My mom gave me the fun cookbook, and my SIL gifted me with Barbara Taylor Bradford's Living Romantically Every Day, which looks fun. I also got book money that I'm very much looking forward to spending! Thanks, everybody, you sure know how to spoil a bookworm.


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2025 Goodreads Reading Challenge
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