I threw my husband a big BBQ/pool party for his birthday last night, so I'm a little groggy. Hopefully, this post makes sense :) Anyway, I just wanted to mention two things really quick before I go back to bed energetically start my housework.

First, I joined two new challenges. Yes, I am aware that I just FAILED to complete two that I signed up for, but I just can't help myself. You can laugh at my challenge addiction here on my challenge blog.

Also, I updated my list of book blog links. I entered about a dozen, but I still feel like I'm missing people. If yours isn't on there, would you let me know? Don't be shy - one of the best way to drive traffic to your blog is advertising! Plus, I love reading book blogs - I don't want to miss any.

That's it. I'm gonna run out for a smoothie, then I'm hitting the hay. I'm SO not a party animal. *Yawn*

Stand by Debbie Williamson is one of those books that make you want to grab your kids, hug them as hard as you can, and tell them how much you love them. Like Dave Pelzer's memoirs, Williamson's details a life of neglect, abuse and family dysfunctionality. Her story compels in the same way a roadside accident does - morbid curiosity makes us stare, empathy makes us shake our heads, and relief lets us flee, thanking God that we escaped similar tragedy.

Debbie's story begins long before her birth. Stand tells the stories of her mother and grandmother - two women who suffer from parental neglect as well as emotional and sexual abuse. The family's horrific "legacy" persists into Debbie's generation. Not only is she raped by a trusted uncle, but her mother ignores her, and both parents cheat on each other repeatedly. Her home life in shambles, Debbie turns to drugs, sex, and partying to fill up her life. Not surprisingly, she finds herself pregnant at 16.

Because it is "the right thing to do," the young couple marry. At first, Debbie adores her new life as a wife and mother. It's not long, however, before the union begins deteriorating. Joe turns to alcohol and prostitutes to escape the prison of married life. At home with her children all day, Debbie suffers from depression, which is only exacerbated by the daily insults Joe screams at her. Overwhelmed by both her past and her present, she loses control. When she owns up to how much time she's spending drinking, arguing with her husband, yelling at her kids, and sleeping around, Debbie realizes she's become the one thing she never wanted to be - her mother.

Finally at the end of her rope, Debbie enrolls in a kind of therapy boot camp. The program empowers her, giving her the strength to overcome her struggles. It doesn't make her life perfect, but it marks the beginning of a bright, new future.

On her website, Debbie explains that her original intention was to write out her experiences as a sort of journal for her children. Stand certainly reads more like a diary - with grammatical errors; fluctuating tense, shifting points of view; and lack of organization - than a polished book. Simple and heartfelt, Debbie's words do get the message across, just not with the panache of a well-written memoir. It also has a psychic/voices of the dead aspect that tarnishes the author's credibility - at least for those of us who don't believe in such things.


What I do admire about this book is Debbie's honesty. She explains on her website how reluctant she was to share her story with the world. Although she didn't want her family to suffer from the exposure of its dark secrets, she bravely took the risk. She doesn't sugarcoat her experiences or try to make herself look like the perfect wife and mother. Admittedly, she lays much of the blame for her family's dysfunctionality on the males, but she doesn't sugarcoat her own shortcomings either. She confesses that not all of her relationships have healed, but that through forgiveness, honesty and time, she's sure they will. The chapter on forgiveness particularly moved me. In Debbie's words:


He wasn't a monster to me anymore. Instead, he became a little person who had made a horrible mistake. I forgave him. I didn't have to ask God anymore how to forgive. I finally knew how (131).


Child abuse does not rank highly on my list of Favorite Subjects to Read About, so I haven't read a lot of books like Stand. I have no doubt there are better-written books on the subject. However, I don't regret reading this one. It could use some serious editing, but all in all, it's a pretty powerful little book.



Grade: B-




(Book Image from Barnes & Noble)

So much fun stuff is going on the book blogosphere right now that I just had to mention a few things:

** I just received an email from up-and-coming YA author Kamilla Reid asking me to review her sci fi/fantasy book The Questory of Root Karbunkulus. The novel hasn't reached me yet - and trust me, I'm waiting breathlessly for it - but the website and trailer look fabulous. Next month, I'll be bringing you some fun stuff related to the book; for now, click here to visit Kamilla's gorgeous site.

** Stephanie over at The Written Word is giving away a copy of Nefertiti by Michelle Moran. She raved about the historical novel in her recent review. To enter, click here.

** Amanda at A Patchwork of Books has 5 copies of The Adoration of Jenna Fox by Mary E. Pearson to give away. Enter here for a chance to win.

** Don't forget about my own giveaway. You can win a brand-spankin'-new copy of Hattie Big Sky by Kirby Larson. I loved the book (you can read my review here). Even if you're not interested in winning, join in the conversation about RAOK you've given or received. Leave your comments here. Reading all the great stories just makes me happy!

** So many great challenges are going on right now that I really want to enter them all. Unfortunately, I'm already drowning in challenges, so the only one I'm actually going to join is the ARC Challenge. You can get all the info here at So Many Precious Books, So Little Time. Check it out. If you are shopping for a challenge, stop by A Novel Challenge - it lists the info for all current challenges. Wow! How many times did I use the word "challenge" in that paragraph?

** Speaking of challenges, I'm just not going to make the deadline for Katrina's Spring Reading Thing or Carl's Once Upon A Time II Challenge. I'm bummed. I will finish my book lists, just not by June 20 :(

** And still speaking of challenges ... Karlene tells me she's got a fun one in the works. Stay tuned for more info at Inksplasher.

Okay, that's all I can remember. Check out all the links and help me spread the love!