For all those mothers who refuse to read fairy tales to their children because the stories are just too violent and scary, I offer you vindication in the form of John Connolly's The Book of Lost Things. It gave me nightmares for two straight nights.

The story begins in London, where 12-year-old David keeps watch over his mother, who is slowly dying. He reads her stories and performs elaborate rituals, but nothing can save her. When she dies, David's world shatters. Before he's even had time to begin grieving, his father hits him with a double whammy: not only does he have a girlfriend, but she is pregnant. The year is 1939, and German bombs crash all over London, but David barely notices - his world is being torn apart by his very own father. Soon, the three of them move into Rose's country home. It is more peaceful than London, but David's heart continues to yearn for his old life. Things only get worse when his stepbrother makes his way into the world. The colicky baby wails non-stop, making the whole family tense and cranky. To make matters worse, David's father works constantly with the war effort, leaving him home with Rose and the squalling infant. His only escape is his bedroom, which is thankfully stocked with shelves of storybooks.

David loves books, but lately they have been making him a little uncomfortable. He can hear them whispering. The old tales, the ones that his mother loved, "seemed to recognize something in him, or so he came to believe, something curious and fertile. He heard them talking: softly at first, then louder and more compellingly" (10). As David examines the storybooks, he finds that many of the fairy tales have been cruelly re-written. Many of them bear the name "Jonathan Tulvey." According to Rose, Jonathan was her great-uncle, who disappeared along with his stepsister when they were children. With tales of werewolves, hobgoblins and witches swirling around in his head, David begins to have frightening visions of a creature skulking about in his room. The figure was "slightly hunched, as though it had become so used to sneaking about that its body had contorted, the spine curving, the arms like twisted branches, the fingers clutching, ready to snatch at whatever it saw" (50-51). Terrified, David tells his father, who dismisses it as his imagination. But the gnarled monster, which David dubs The Crooked Man won't go away. It haunts his bedroom, his dreams, and worse, his brother's nursery. In the midst of these waking nightmares, he hears his mother's voice, begging him to rescue her from the monster's clutches. David follows her voice to a sunken garden, through a tunnel and into a strange, new world.

David knows his mother is trapped somewhere in this alternate reality; he must rescue her. He trudges through a world that seems familiar somehow. He meets a woodsman, who speaks of a girl in a red cloak meeting a wolf in the forest while taking a basket of food to her ailing grandmother. He encounters seven dwarves who toil in a mine and share their cottage with a woman. He discovers a castle encased in thorns, wherein lies a slumbering princess. In short, he has found a land of fairy tales. But these tales have been twisted. Very twisted. Little Red Riding Hood seduces the wolf, producing wolfmen who prowl the forest for anything to tear apart. Snow White makes the dwarves' lives a living hell, and the sleeping beauty resembles Elvira more than a Disney Princess.

The fairy tale world horrifies David with its violence and bloodshed. Enemies taunt him at every turn, and The Crooked Man watches hungrily from the fringes. Still, David presses on, searching for his mother. With danger lurking in every direction, he journeys to see the King of the storybook land, who possesses The Book of Lost Things, which David hopes will help him return home. But, the castle produces the most gruesome sights yet. Can he rescue his mother in time? Or will David be trapped inside the book land forever?

One commenter compared The Book of Lost Things to Cornelia Funke's Inkspell, so I was prepared to be as charmed with the former as I was with the latter. A couple chapters into it, I realized John Connolly's novel was not that kind of book. Instead of charming, The Book of Lost Things is creepy, gory and just downright disturbing. Yet, I could not put it down. Why? In the words of a reviewer with the Houston Chronicle, "Connolly writes like a poet about terrible horrors." It's true. The book's writing is masterful. An observation David makes in the story describes this book perfectly: "David could not equate the beauty of the craftmanship with the sinister place that now held them" (243). The Book of Lost Things is dark, sinister and strangely beautiful. I appreciated Connolly's originality, his mastery of language, and his subtle symbolism, but I can't say I liked the story. It was just so ... disturbing. I kept wondering why Connolly made the book so dark. I finally found this explanation in an interview printed in the back of the book. The author stated:

"In general, though, I was reluctant throughout the book to "sanitize" the old tales in any way, and they remain 'red in tooth and claw' ... to remove the violence and threat from the stories is to take away much of their potency, as well as to undermine the messages they communicate about the sometimes troubling and terrifying nature of the world children inhabit" (417).

If you like the idea of a storybook/fairy tale plot, but don't want all the gore, stick with Inkspell. If you're made of tougher stuff, you may enjoy this book. Just remember when you scream yourself awake at night to chant this mantra: It's just a story. It's just a story. And, if you start hearing your books talk, and seeing visions of The Crooked Man, you may want to set John Connolly's creepy masterpiece aside.

Grade: B
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I really liked this quote about reading, which also appears in the interview at the back of The Book of Lost Things:

"I think the act of reading imbues the reader with a sensitivity toward the outside world that people who don't read can sometimes lack. I know it seems like a contradiction in terms; after all, reading is such a solitary, internalizing act that it appears to represent a disengagement from day-to-day life. But reading, and particularly the readinf of fiction, encourages us to view the world in new and challenging ways. I have always believed that fiction acts as a prism, taking the reality of our existence and breaking it down into its constituent parts, allowing us to see it in a completely differnet form. It allows us to inhabit the consciousness of another, which is a precursor to empathy, and empathy is, for me, one of the marks of a decent human being."

I have a long-standing policy of reviewing everything I read, so it feels kind of wrong not to write about the two books I just finished. Don't worry, I'm not breaking policy, I'm just not going to review these two right now. I read Lisa Daily's Fifteen Minutes of Shame, a chick lit novel that actually had some substance. If you want a sneak peek at this fun book, check out Lisa's official website. If you want my take on it, come back on April 2, when BBB hosts Lisa on her virtual book tour. The other book I finished is The Hostile Hospital by Lemony Snicket. I've been reading his A Series of Unfortunate Events books. When I've finished them, I'll review the series as a whole.

The other thing I want to mention is a fun new reading challenge called Soup's On. You can get all the details here. Basically, you have to "read" (not every word, just enough so you have an idea what it's about) 6 cookbooks and make 1 recipe from each between April 1, 2008 and March 31, 2009. Sounds fun, doesn't it? My reading list will be on my challenge blog in the next couple of days.

Right now, I'm trying to decide what to read next. I've got a pile of review books, a TBR mountain chain, plus I just ordered a bunch of books using MyPoints rewards (have you heard of MyPoints? If not, check it out. I've been doing it for years, and I love the program. If you sign up, would you mind putting my name in as the one who referred you? You will probably have to use my email address susanrjensen[AT]yahoo[DOT]com. Thanks.), and I've got a bag full of books from the library. Hmmm ... choices, choices.

It's come to my attention that I am earning a reputation as the Simon Cowell of book reviewers. First, I got an email from an author telling me how much she enjoyed my "very honest and candid" reviews. This, she wrote is "something I appreciate very much as a reader but which terrified me a little as an author who is very aware of my own limitations." I laughed at the thought of little ole me being that intimidating. Then, last night, I got an email from a friend who has been telling me about an author she really enjoys. I've "met" this author via email, although I haven't gotten to her books yet (I promise I will, R). Anyway, my friend wrote, "I'm nervous about your review of R's books and I didn't even write them!" Between these two conversations as well as other comments I've received, I've realized that I'm starting to resemble Mr. Cowell (although I don't wear undershirts in public). I really am a very nice person. Seriously. In real life, I'm much more like Paul Abdul (without the hit records). I would be more likely to gush, "It wasn't your best performance, but you look gorgeous" than "It was horrendous. Absolute rubbish."

The funny thing is, I am the least opinionated person you'll ever meet. If my husband asks where I want to eat, I usually say, "Oh, Olive Garden. Or Applebees. Or Outback. Whatever. I don't care." But, when it comes to books, I know what I like and what I don't. Amazingly, I form very strong opinions about the things I read. So, if I slam a book you've written and/or loved, I just want to quote my favorite American Idol judge: "Saw-ree, it's just my opinyon."

(Image from www.starblogs.net)

Okay, I know you think I am just ranting (and I sort of am), but these thoughts really do have something to do with the book I'm reviewing, Magyk by Angie Sage. Of course, explaining how my rant relates will lead to a spoiler (kind of), so I'll leave it 'til the end of the review. Don't worry - I'll warn you with bold type and lots of exclamation points so you won't inadvertently read something that will ruin the story for you.

Magyk tells the story of the Heaps, a family of 8 who live in The Ramblings, a kind of apartment complex for commoners. Although humble, the Heaps possess bright green eyes - telltale signs of a wizarding family. When the story opens, Sarah Heap has given birth to yet another boy. Baby Septimus is the seventh son of a seventh son, a position which destines him to become a powerful wizard. With the infant safely delivered, his father, Silas, treks into the forest to collect herbs for the baby. As he hustles home in the growing darkness, Silas hears something whimpering in the bushes. When he bends down, he's startled to find a baby laying on the cold, snowy ground. Kind-hearted Silas scoops up the infant and heads toward home. Before he can make it to his front door, a tall figure in purple warns him, "Tell no one you found her. She was born to you. Understand?" (5) A confused Silas rushes on, only to be met at his own door by the midwife, who is running out with Septimus' still form. "Dead!" she cries (6).

Although Sarah and Silas grieve for Septimus, they soon settle into life with their 6 boys and baby daughter. They tell no one about finding the infant in the snow. Six months later, Sarah receives troubling news from the castle - the Queen, who has not been seen publicly since her baby was born, has been shot by an assassin. Rumor has it that the infant princess was spirited away before the killer could get to her. Sarah realizes instantly what has happened. Her 6-month-old daughter is, in fact, the princess.

Ten years later, a friendly ghost warns the Heaps that trouble is on the horizon - the castle's new ruler has commanded an assassin to eliminate the princess. The Heaps flee to their Aunt Zelda's cottage on the isolated marshes, dragging an ExtraOrdinary Wizard, a slobbering wolfhound and a terrified boy soldier with them. As the group bands together, they discover a great many things, all of which will help them take on the evil Necromancer determined to finish off the princess for good.

Although it was predictable, the book kept me turning pages. I would have liked more character development, but basically the cast was sympathetic. Several of the characters - Marcia Overstrand, Aunt Zelda and Boy 412, for instance - were more interesting than others. The characters I most enjoyed were magical beings, like Princess Jenna's pet rock, Zelda's helpful Boggart, and the put-upon messenger rat. The magykal world, with its charms, spells and various enchantments, intrigued me. Probably my favorite passages in the book are those in which Marcia terrorizes doors, appliances and mirrors, all of which have feelings about their punishment. Another thing I enjoyed about this book is the Extras at the end. You can get a taste of these delights at Angie Sage's fun website.

Okay, onto the not-so-good stuff. Occasionally, Sage's writing drove me crazy. She shifted viewpoints at random, sometimes in the middle of paragraphs. It wasn't so much confusing as just plain annoying. She also relied heavily on adverbs, another thing which drives me nuts. I counted 8 on one page, and they're small pages. The writing was also very choppy in places. This is small potatoes, however, and I could have lived with it if it wasn't for this ...

WARNING - SPOILERS AHEAD (although they're so obvious, I don't know if I'd really call them spoilers; nonetheless, you've been warned) !!! My biggest beef with this book is Angie Sage's assumption that her readers are not all that smart. I was irritated by sentences like these, which seemed to imply that readers need to have things spelled out to them:

"Then he screamed again, this time in pain. He had broken his fifth metacarpal. His little finger" (133). I don't know about you, but I understood that his fifth metacarpal was his little finger.

"There was an unhappy silence. No one liked what Alther had said" (439). Duh. That's why the silence is unhappy.

Am I being nitpicky? Probably, but I hate it when the author insults my intelligence. As if these examples weren't enough, Angie Sage saves her big reveal for the end. Boy 412 is Septimus Heap. What, you say? Septimus didn't die? No, he didn't, but we know that from the moment we glance at Magyk's cover, which proudly proclaims it to be Septimus Heap, Book One. So, when a 10-year-old boy of unknown origin appears in the story, it's pretty obvious who he is. But, the author waits until the very ending of the book to make the big reveal. To me, that was obnoxious, since I had known his true identity from the beginning. This one thing killed the book for me. Angie Sage made her surprise ending so obvious that it wasn't a surprise at all.

SPOILER OVER!!!!

So, if it hadn't been for that one thing, I really would have enjoyed reading Magyk. Since the big revelation is out of the way, I'm hoping the next volumes in this series continue the exciting story of the Heap Family, without lazing around with surprise endings that aren't surprises at all.
Grade: C